im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
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