You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
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