I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
We talked him into tasing himself.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
