I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I CAN MOONWALK!
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize
