Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
