im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Randomize
