Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Randomize
