Midget sex pt 2 tonight
when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
