a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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