I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Randomize
