She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
