my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
