I'm really into asian looking animals
How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize
