is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
