so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
