We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize
