Kiss
Puke
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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