He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
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