i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Randomize
