watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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