Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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