Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
