thus making me awesome and them whores
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize
