Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Randomize
