Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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