We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
