after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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