Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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