Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Well I just put wine in my tea
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize