he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
