Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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