But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Randomize
