I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
