Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
