giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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