Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
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