Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
