I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
