why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
