your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
