Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Jerry, you need to find god
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Randomize
