dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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