Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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