She said her name was "party"
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Randomize
