I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Randomize
