oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
