a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize
