he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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