his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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