ugly people sure do ruin things
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
