im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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